Carson's 6th Birthday!

Ok, this post is a LITTLE behind! I am playing catch up for sure, but I am getting it done. :) My sweet Carson turned 6 on December 19th. I seriously do not know where the years have gone, there are days that I look at him and think "Gosh he's so big!" and other days when I think "He's still my baby". Of course he is still my baby (don't tell him that-he might punch you).

We had originally planned a ice-skating party for C, but unfortunately his Daddy cancelled his party due to Carson's bad attitude. So, we had a family gathering and went to The North Pole Express in Grapevine. Had a blast! I think my Mimi and I had the most fun, it definitely makes you feel like a little kid again. Below are some pics of the special day.

And again Happy Birthday sweet Carson!
Breakfast in Bed
Snowman Pancakes

Mimi & Umpa

Umpa and our Host

Sexperiment

I have got to get something off my chest. Last night and today, I have seen TONS of FB posts and comments speaking out against Ed and Lisa Young's Sexperiment and the way the are promoting it today on the rooftop of their church building while in a "bed". You can see their live broadcast here I am amazed at the amount of people that haven't seen or heard what The Youngs have to say, but are trashing them, and I mean seriously trashing them! WOW! It immediately makes me think of the amount of religious leaders that tried over and over to prove that Jesus was wrong, and put so much energy into "hating" him that they missed God. I am amazed that people in the church today are wasting so much energy trying to prove someone wrong to everybody else. It just makes me sad, and I had to get it out!

I am going to be very honest here, again me being real. I could live the rest of my life without having sex. Seriously. And yes, I went there! My husband however, does not feel the same way! :) With all my anxiety issues, and other things, it is the LAST thing I want to do. I pray a lot about this issue, and while I wish that I could have the intimacy that God ordained for our marriage, I don't. Anyway, this is something that I am working out with God, myself, and my husband, who is being very patient with me (bless him).

I just think that if some of these people were experiencing some issues in this area, they would understand why it's so important that this subject be approached. While yes, I have heard about it in church before, to the extent of "God, says have sex with your husband", that hasn't actually helped me. So, I am tuning in today from time to time to see what they have to say. They are talking about all kinds of things, and interviewing other couples, pastors, and their own grown kids. Along with the marriage sex topics, they are also talking about how to share with your kids about sex, etc.

PS I do not go to this church, so I am not biased! :) And did I mention that they have been together since they were 15, married at 21, and have been married 30 years? That speaks volumes to me!

Who I Am

I am not perfect.
I am a child of God.
I get mad at my kids.
I don't always speak kindly to my husband.
While I have every good intention of teaching my children good, Godly principles, I fall short.
My kids do not wake up and recite scripture.
Lately it takes everything I have to get to church once a month.
I have abandonment/rejection issues.
I constantly battle Satan's lies about what I think others think about me.
I mourn friendships that no longer exist.
I want to be an amazing friend.
I get my feelings hurt easily.
I take hurtful words to heart.
I lose my temper frequently.
I can not tell a lie. (seriously I can't)
I sometimes take on a little too many projects at once.
I love pink.
I love to be girly.
I struggle with anxiety/panic attacks and have for over 10 years.
I sometimes walk in a room and have no idea what I am doing in there.
I wish I had embraced my senior year of high school more.
I have really big feet.
I LOVE shoes.
I like to drink wine.
I love time with my girlfriends.
Date nights make me happy.
I secretly want to drive a tank (oops not so secret anymore).
Quiet time with God is hard for me.
I can't stand fake people.
I love my boys (even when they drive me crazy).
I love my husband (even when he drives me crazy).
I sometimes say things I regret.
I love Jesus, and am so thankful for his sacrifice and forgiveness.

*UPDATE* I would like to challenge anyone who reads this to be "real" also. Post your Who Am I? I think we should get a movement started! Letting other women (and men) know that they are not alone, and that the only perfect person is Jesus!

Accepting Change

I am trying out my new App Blogger for my new IPhone. Yep, I finally took the plunge and joined the club! Maybe this will help me keep back up with my blogging! For those of you that know me, I don't do change well. And this Apple thing is a whole new world for me. LOL Oh well, here's to accepting change in the modern world.

Not About Me

A friend of mine's husband recently died suddenly during emergency heart surgery. She is my age, her 2 boys are the same age as Dalton and Carson. I hurt for her. I mean really hurt for her. I find myself weeping, sobbing, and having anxiety for what her and her boys are going through. And as much as my heart hurts for them, it is NOTHING even close to what they are feeling. I am writing this for a couple of reasons: 1. For you to please lift Jennifer Ogle, her boys Hudson and Cooper, and the rest of Jason's family in prayer. I know that right now she said she can feel the prayers and they are keeping her going. 2. To remember that we are here for a limited amount of time, to leave a legacy for Jesus.

While I didn't know Jason, it is so obvious that he truly left a legacy and definitely touched people. I pray that this will remain evident to his boys as they grow and they will turn to God their heavenly Father as their Dad did. I am going to post a link to her blog and to the memorial fund incase any of you would like to donate and or follow her experience. She is blogging as an outlet right now, and while her pain is obvious, her faith shows through in multitudes! Please come together prayer warriors!

Jennifers Blog: www.mom2hudsonandcooper.blogspot.com

Memorial Fund: http://www.giveforward.com/inlovingmemoryofjasonogle

Women of Faith Dallas 2011

Ok ladies-it's almost here! One of my favorit times of the year...time for Women of Faith! For those of you that have never been, it is Amazing! It's almost too much for words. Every year, I am pretty sure that God hand picked the speakers just for me and my season of life. But then I find out from my friends that they felt almost the exact same way! I love it when God does that! ;)

Anyway, WOF this year is going to be Aug 26th and 27th at American Airlines Center. I would love to have you be a part of my group, we have super great seats this year! In the lower 100's area- Woo-Hoo! The cost for both full days including box lunch both days, is $89. Please contact me if you would like to attend. To be able to keep our super great seats, I will need to have payment turned in by June 10th.

You can click HERE to see this year's line-up.

Beautiful

Let me first state that this post is in no way written to gain sympathy or compliments. But to celebrate in the freedom I have gained in Christ!!!

I have never considered myself pretty, NEVER. This is probably a result of mean kids in my past constantly telling me how ugly I was, and I know that this happens alot (not just to me). However, I bought the lie! I allowed Satan to have bondage over me in so many ways, and this was one of them!

There are 2 times in my life that I remember feeling pretty. The first was when I was 10 years old, and my mom had registered me in a Mini Miss Pageant. The second was on my wedding day. The first time was crushed when I was told I didn't win because I was so ugly, and there was no way I could ever be picked for anything like that. My wedding day however, still remains one of those times! :) I believed Satan's whispers anytime I tried out for a modeling something or other and didn't get it (you are just too ugly-you will never get picked for anything like this). Or when guys wouldn't stay with me (nobody wants you-so and so is so pretty-and look at you). I have shared my testimony on here before, and God just keeps adding to it!

Recently, my friend Kim with All About Pictures took some pictures of me (some for fun, and some for business purposes). When I first saw the pictures, I was shocked! I told her that her editing was amazing, because I didn't look like that in my mirror! Later that week however, I felt God whispering to me..."You are beautiful, you do look like this, you are my daughter, and I created you." WOW! Later, I had posted some of the pics on FB, and I was completely overwhelmed at the amount of unexpected comments! And again, I heard God whispering..."This is you, you are beautiful, everyday." Again WOW!

Tears were flowing this time, as I truly felt another huge brick of bondage lifted off of my chest! I cannot believe that I bought the lie! I didn't even realize that I had believed it for so long, but I really did. Every time I looked in the mirror, I just saw me-plain, ordinary, not pretty by any means. And, while I am so very sad that I allowed Satan to hold this over me for so very long, I am so excited now that not only do I know the truth, but that I truly believe it! I am beautiful! Inside and out! I can look in a mirror and say "I am pretty"!

I felt compelled to post this for others that may feel or have felt the same as I did. God loves you! He created you in His image! And he wants you to know Him! How amazingly awesome is that???!!!! I am so grateful everyday for what Christ did for me on the cross, and also for God continuously reminding me that He is here for me, that He loves me, and will NEVER leave me! I have always loved Psalm 139, but now I cling to it, as I encourage you to do the same! :)

So, thank you to Kim, for being a tool from God to help me crush one more lie! And thank you to my friend Tabitha for sharing words with me during this time that could only come from Him! I am blessed with amazing friends! Below are a couple of the pics: